PACK RULE #1

Never continue to pay us labor for something we can fix with hardware. Of course the labor is good for us… but bad for you

PACK RULE #2

Our job is to make sure that you are operational, so you can make money. Sometimes that means we may hurt your feelings.

PACK RULE #3

You get what you pay for, so never forget that reliability is worth every penny

PACK RULE #4

Quality of life is much more important than money. Love what you do

PACK RULE #8

Clients with boats shall henceforth be referred to as preferred customers

PACK RULE #9

When watching our competitors follow in our footsteps. Never get angry, just remember…key word “follow”. We will always lead.

PACK RULE #10

Jägermeister is a tonic with medicinal properties. Don’t ever let anyone tell you differently

PACK RULE #11

You can’t work for Helix if you believe in a 40 hour work week. Our “normal” business hours are 8 to 6, and after 6 is when we really get shit done

PACK RULE #5

What we do is not an exact science, so we may not know exactly why something happened

PACK RULE #6

You are NOT bothering us, It is our job to fix you computer even if you are infected AGAIN

PACK RULE #7

No matter what our condition from the night before we will be there for you

PACK RULE #12

Odds are that we are going to mess with you, so don’t be suprised if do. Humor helps keep us sane

PACK RULE #14

We’re not sorry that we didn’t tell you want you wanted to hear